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Esther Castillo de Centellas
Thursday I got a voicemail from my Brother... my parents called and my abuelita (grandmother) was very sick. I talked to my parents a little later and learned that she now had leukemia. She had been sick for years and slowly losing her vision as she aged. I learned that the doctors had given her only a few days left to live. It was my last chance to see her, and thanks to my work, and with Heather's support I purchased my ticket to fly to Bolivia the following morning. By luck I got a flight and would be in Bolivia in barely 24 hours.
I packed and prepared for my trip in barely two hours and then went to Ann Arbor. Thursday night was a visitation for my Great Uncle Bob Vaden. I had planned to attend his funeral on Friday but instead was going to Bolivia and I know my American family understood. I was glad I was able to make the visitation and Heather came as well which was nice as we visited with family.
Friday my trip started at 4:30 AM with the drive to the airport... my 7 AM flight arrived in Miami around 11 AM and waited for Andres who was arriving from Washington DC. We got some lunch and caught our 1PM flight. A long flight later... we arrived in Santa Cruz at nearly 11PM. Our parents greeted us and took us for the first visit to their new home.
On arrival most of the family was at the house. My uncles and aunts and cousins were all there and we took turns looking in at abuelita. She had been moved to my parents house and had a nurse with her. We got some late night chicken, ate, caught up on times with my parents and then finally got some sleep.
Saturday was long as well. Abuelita was doing worse, but fortunately the rest of the family from La Paz came. With everyone at the house my mom was of course stressed and trying to play hostest to the 40 plus people coming and going from the house all day. You could tell abuelita knew she was in her last days... she could no longer see, and her speech was broken at best. On Saturday she only really asked for three things that people understood... she asked my cousin David to read her favorite Psalms, number 27 and 91. Then she asked for my mom to sing her favorite hymns, and with all her might she tried to sign along. Finally she asked to listen to her Christian radio station to relax. Such faith...
I remember from when my abuelito passed... for nearly a week he had not been able to move or talk. However on the day of their 60th wedding anniversary he clearly tried to kiss my abuelita, and mumbled the only sounds all week that came from his mouth. If that doesn't give someone faith in god and love nothing can. We all need reminding at times. My abuelita held on until her sister arrived from Cochabama... and for the family to arrive from La Paz... then asked for prayers, palms, hymns, and laid to rest for the night.
That night the decision was made to remove her from all drugs except her sedatives and that at any time she would pass. Andres and I took my mom our for dinner that night to get away from the house for a little while. We ate a great steak dinner (no I didn't take a photo of it) and a bottle of wine and enjoyed being in Santa Cruz.
I awoke throughout the night as people took turns checking in on abuelita. Finally it was at 6 AM on Sunday that our aunt (who is an Oncologist and was able to help a lot) came out of the room saying abuelita passed. It was a weird feeling... relief that she was resting in peace now... happiness that she was in heaven with her husband of 60 years... sadness to see the strongest little woman leave our presence... I will never really be able to understand how I felt but I didn't cry at that time. I actually laughed inside, thinking about how mad our abuelita was I am sure inside that all those people came to the house and she wasn't well dressed and well presented (she was always elegantly dressed). She was a quirky little woman.
It was my first time in Bolivia during a death so I got to learn many of our customs. Shortly after her passing her sister and a few of my aunts washed and dressed her. They talked about which suit to put her in, and her earings and how she would want to be presented. Family came to the house to see her before she was taken to the funeral home. Andres and I went on a mission to make a picture board. While there the idea dawned on us and our cousin David to make some picture cards with Psalms 91 on it. I found a photo I had of her and abuelito and it fit the Psalm perfectly. Sunday around 2 PM nearly the entire Centellas clan was at the funeral home. We took turns leaving for meals and making sure there was always family there to greet visitors.
At 8 PM on Sunday was the wake service. A short service of prayers and hymns, some people stood in front and spoke about the abuelita. She had well over 100-150 people at the service. What surprised me was that the wake lasted all night and people were coming in at nearly midnight when Andres and I had to call it quits to get some sleep.
We returned at 9 AM for the funeral service to find over 200 people there. Students of my uncles, co-workers, friends, abuelitas church friends, and people from their neighborhood. There were over 40 flower arrangements around her casket. Another short service of prayers, hymns and testimonials... and finally the tears came. It came when I thought that this was my first trip to Bolivia that my abuelitos had not been at the airport waiting for me... and it would never be the same. I didn't get to spend a lot of time with them cause of the distance, but I know cause of god and their faith they prayed for me each night. I am glad abuelita got to meet Novali and play with her in the pool and listen to her Spanish, I cried cause I was happy they got to meet.
It was a long drive to the cementary... but it was a beautiful place outside of the city. Here the custom is to lay caskets on top of each other. So abuelitas casket would be placed right on top of abuelitos. A few prayers there, a short service... and then many from the family spoke. The uncles, some cousins, my father, mother, and Andres and I both spoke. Then we tossed flowers on her casket as they lowered it down. Once it was resting down we all took a handful of dirt and put her to rest.
We left... the entire family went to eat together, her five sons, her sister, abuelitos brother and wife and two of their daughters, 13 grandchildren, and a handful of great grandchildren as well. Honestly, even when us gringos Centellas visited the entire family never got to together. Issues between uncles, cousins always got in the way. But this time, for abuelita everyone was together. We ate, laughed, and enjoyed each others company.
If there was one thing abuelita would of wanted was for the entire family to be together. Funny... she always knew how to get her way...
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